I left the church so I could sin my pants off

Actually, my wife and I didn't. But any boiling TBM who peeks into my life now would make that very statement.

When I turned 21, I was not a Mormon. My wife was, but was not actively attending church (though she will point out that she still had a testimony then, and just wasn't choosing the right). We went to a nearby Applebee’s so I could legally order a drink. I ordered a Bahama Mama that tasted horrible. I now know that was because I went to an Applebee’s for my first drink.

I used to have an occasional strawberry daiquiri when eating at restaurants. They didn't taste bad and were usually a good addition to the overall flavor of the meal.

I grew up with alcohol in the house. My dad drinks scotch. He used to occasionally have one of us boys pour him a drink when he got home. Three ice cubes and two or three fingers high. My dad also drank beer for as long as I can remember. My mother occasionally would have some, but never really had one all her own. They both consumed wine as well. I still remember the old days of getting a "wine in a box" at the liquor store. I still recall going to the liquor store on a regular basis (one can find a lot of them in New York state), and have fond memories of one we frequented in Fishkill between Shop Rite and the Hudson Valley Mall. I love the memories of real, homemade eggnog during the holidays (complete with rum).

So I wasn't much of a drinker, even though it had always been around me. I recall an instance where I told my mother I would never drink beer, to which her reply was, "you'll think differently one day." I used to think that I had been neatly prepared to receive the Word of Wisdom portion of the Mormon doctrine because I didn't like alcohol, coffee, or tea.

Now, my wife and I have resigned our memberships in the Mormon church over reasons of doctrine, history, logic, reality, and common sense. We've told a few people this - even our neighbor, who was our home teacher.

After about eight years in the church, and now hitting my 30s, I found I wanted to live a little. I hadn't done much living while in my late teens and early 20s, and had been baptized before turning 23 anyway. So in my exodus from the church, I let go of some of my apprehensions.

Honestly, joining the church would have been so much harder had I had a few drinks before my baptism (no, not right before the baptism, though that would now be funny).

I've always had an affinity for rum in my eggnog, though even that had created some interesting flaws in my beliefs over the years. I guess I'm a rumaholic, because I can't get enough of it (mixed, not straight). My favorite has been rum and coke - which most people will find to be a joke. But damn good, I must say. Dark rum with mixed in equal portions with coke, with a squeeze of real, fresh-cut lime... excellent. If you want some good, and tasty, rum additions, try rum and root beer (A&W is the best). Rum and Pibb Extra (formerly Mr. Pibb) is also a good combination. Malibu rum is very tasty by itself or in sweet soda combinations (such as the root beer or Pibb). Malibu and cranberry is great. Hell, Malibu and apple juice is good too.

Last weekend I got very tipsy (drunk) for the first time. I always feared being drunk, like I was losing control of my life. I found it actually made life itself less controlling over me. I could enjoy myself. I didn't throw up. My head was in a buzz, but I still had reasonable control over precise actions. Even best, I could laugh and have a good time. I even tried scotch (although it had club soda in it - sweeter than I thought).

You see, I've become the sinner they think I am. I obviously left the church so I could sin – I’ve proved them right!

Eric